School’s back in session!

I almost don't know where to begin. When I sat down to write this week's blog, I was all set to write about divorce and the mix of feelings that go with the road to divorce. Trust me, that blog is coming.

Then I sat down to write. I couldn't hear my thoughts. The sounds of 2nd grade happening next to me are too distracting. Then the yell of "MOOOM" coming from 4th grade happening upstairs needed my attention. It was there I realized the blog was changing today for sure. This school year is BANANAS! This is what we are all saying to each other all day every day. I feel like a crazy person repeating it. But bears repeating! This moment in time is just INSANE! Teachers are working around the clock. Children are asked to learn in ways we have not prepared them for. Parents are rearranging their worlds on a moment to moment basis. There is a constant feeling of anxiety in the air that has just become a part of everyday life that we almost don't feel it anymore. The question to me then becomes, what are we anxious about? Goodness, the worries are endless? Are the kids going to be able to learn like this? I watch them juggle different apps. Walk another friend through something. Hand in work. Poof! I can check that worry off the list. Okay, they are learning. Is reading, writing, and 'rithmetic enough? What about social interactions? But then I see them "log in" early so they can talk to their friends. Poof! I can check that worry off the list. Then I sit down to work. Four seconds after my tush hits the seat. Someone needs something. I am up again. How will I get anything done? I sit back down and realize that I wrote a lot already. That I am further in the module of learning than I realized. Poof! I can breathe. It will get done. Maybe slower than it would have if they were in school. But it will get done. Oh, the teachers! I can't even begin to list all their worries. Most of them have all the concerns for their own families listed above while dealing with our crazy. They are learning to teach in a way that they were never trained to do. Teachers are working from multiple screens. They are monitoring and teaching the kids. They are checking assignments while posting more work. Poof! It's day three. Even though there have been some bumps, everyone is doing great! The teachers are doing it all. They are even making all the kids feel like a community and creating bonds. Our teachers are superheroes!

The truth is, we can worry about anything at any time—pandemic or not. We doubt ourselves. We over-analyze. We second guess all of our choices. We make ourselves insane, comparing ourselves to other mothers. We measure our children's achievements to other children. Where does it end? Maybe instead of being afraid of all, we are missing, we should celebrate all we have gained? It turns out it doesn't freaking matter if little Susie missed part of third grade when applying to college because so did every other stinking little Susie. Who cares that your kid is not playing a full season of travel baseball. Let’s be honest; they're not going pro or getting that scholarship. Start saving for college with or without COVID.

Mama Nature is asking all of us to slow the heck down, to get to know your family. She asked you to make "pods.” Maybe this has allowed you to explore new friendships and partnerships that would never have happened. The world right now is asking us to have hard conversations. We have them. Perhaps this pandemic has weeded out some folks. We are being asked to stand up for what is most important for one's self and family. Perhaps before all this, you were afraid to use your voice. I have found that this new normal has allowed me to reevaluate what matters most myself and my people. Between shared custody, starting a new business, a new relationship, and our health and safety, I have only allowed people that cheer and protect us in my bubble. I have also deepened friendships. I have learned so much about friends and loved ones. I think it is a gift that this insanity has shown people's true colors. Some of them not as bright as I may have once thought. I have found my voice and strength and used it. You know what? It turns out it isn't as scary as I thought. People don't get mad at you. They listen. I have found it has brought me closer to people. They now know me as my authentic self.

Don't get me wrong. I want to get back to life. I would like these crazy kids back at school. Mama needs some moments to hear herself think. It turns out my son may be a little exhausting in class? I mean, his teachers can't believe this little jabber jaws is that cute? Ha! These kids are need machines! With the responsibility of their education falling for the most part solely on me, this is A LOT! I miss hugging the snot out of people. I can handle the mask, but it isn't enjoyable. Overall I am not entirely mad at this quiet life. I like the little safe bubble we have created. I am grateful for the cheers and support I am getting from my quaran-Team.

For all you out there, the kids are going to be alright. We are living the same mess. They will be just as okay or F'ed up as the kid next to them. Take a deep breath. Stop overthinking. Give yourself a break. If you're worried, you're not doing enough for the kids, the fact that you're thinking about that makes you a great Mom! It is the same as always. NONE of us have this crap figured out. Really how much more can this mess them up? Weren't we all in the So listen to Mama Nature. Take care of yourself and others. Wear a mask as you take those deep breaths. This too, shall pass. Remember, Mama is always right?

Oops I did it…again

I did it. Again. Now the real learning can begin. Before it does, you may be wondering why do I torture myself? How did I get here? What is the point if this willpower test is only 30 days, and then I am right back to eat all the things?

Well, let me first take you back to how I got to Whole30. If you've gotten this far on my website, it is safe to assume you've heard a bit about my motherhood journey. If you haven't read anything, I will sum it up for you. IT WAS NOT EASY!!! FIVE pregnancies in FOUR years with two kids to hold in my arms. You get the picture. Tack onto that, by the time I finished having those two monkeys; I was pushing forty. Annoyingly, in the world of gestation, that's old. (In the world of real women, that's when we are getting to the good stuff!) All of the above factors had, without me knowing, an effect on my health. About a year after Sullivan's birth, I started having gastrointestinal issues. Not to get too graphic, but I would go a DAYS without pooping. DAAAYS followed that in the complete opposite direction. You get the gist. I was still experiencing night sweats as if I had just given birth. I was breaking out in welts and hives all over my body weekly. The final annoying symptom was waking up with Bell’s palsy like symptoms every couple of months. If you don't know what that is, you look as if you've had a stroke. One side of your face has dropped. It is something I experienced pregnant. In my twenties, I would sometimes get this right before getting sick. Dealing with it on this regular basis was not the norm and disheartening. At my next annual exam with my beloved OB/GYN, Dr. Anderson, I expressed my concerns. She addressed them by telling me, "Well, Liz, you are forty. You've put your body through a lot. You're probably experiencing perimenopause." I promptly told her to F off! What the menopause?!?

After I calmed down, she suggested putting myself through some version of an elimination diet to see how my body processes different foods and preservatives now that my hormones have changed so much. I ignored this suggestion for two years. I went on dealing with the symptoms, chasing kids, and trying to keep up with life. The symptoms got worse and more frequent. So much so that I went to a GI doctor. Many tests were done, including a colonoscopy and endoscopy. Blood was taken, showing that I could have Celiac disease. It was a mess. At that time, I said to my ex-husband, I think it is time to look into my diet and change it. This was June of 2019. I had already researched #Whole30. I bought the books. I was following Whole30 folks on Insta. I decided to dive in. I told my then-husband that I was going to have the summer of my dreams. I was going to eat and drink ALL THE THINGS! Not care about weight or health. Just go wild! Then in September, I would complete my first Whole30. He was ready to take the plunge with me. That was what we did. We ate. We drank. Then we ate and drank some more. It was as decadent and wonderful as it sounds.

Right after Labor Day, it all came to a hard stop. Honestly, we were ready. We had indulged so much that we were grossed out and prepared for the change to health. I am not going to lie. The first couple of weeks were tough. I had headaches. I was irritable. I felt like a Mack truck had hit me. I was tired of all the dishes and thinking about food all the time. I even had a dream that I ate a sandwich. It was so real I woke up thinking it happened. I was so upset that I had done all that work and screwed it up with a sandwich! It was a riot when I came to my senses. It was also clear that I was not feeding my body with the right things. Week three hit. Everything changed. I was sleeping. Get this...through the night! And there wasn't a sweat to be found. I realized I hadn't had a hive in weeks. I had TONS of energy. My poop! Oh, my poop was regular. I was a believer. The Whole30 lifestyle got more comfortable, as well. The best part was this lifestyle was helping me in other avenues of my life that I didn't even anticipate. In the world of Whole30, they are called Non-Scale Victories. Man, was I victorious. I have always been a little nervous to speak up for myself or appear "high maintenance.” On Whole30 I had no choice but to ask for what I needed, so I did. I listened as others complained about people not being able to eat this or that. I felt the eyes roll when I was specific in my edits of a menu when out with friends. I didn't care. The overall health I was feeling far outweighed all the judgment. I began to start to get comfortable with living and advocating for the best version of myself. Wasn't this precisely what I was always preaching to my kids about? Now I wasn't just talking the talk. I was walking the walk. They were witnessing all of this evolution of Mom. It was great. Of course, I didn't stay Whole30 all the time.

Now I generally eat in a Whole30 fashion Sunday through Friday. On the weekends, I tend to throw more caution to the wind. I found out that dairy and I do not get along. Tummy troubles and night sweats jump in when I eat any dairy. I apply the #FoodFreedom way of thinking, "Is this worth it?" If it is on the weekend, I go for it. I'm not going to lie. I go for it more times than I don't. Soy is generally not my friend. My joints hurt, my face gets swollen, and poop? Well, I will see you in a few days. Sometimes I even get headaches. Gluten, my body is pretty okay processing. But sugar? OY! It all comes flying back. Before this August Whole30, I did partake in a pie three days in a row that wrecked me. No sleep. GI issues like you read about. Night sweats were back in full effect. I had joint and back pain. It was worth every part of that nastiness. That pie was just that good! That is the beauty of Whole30. You make decisions that are best for you. It is not a diet. It is a lifestyle. I know. We all hate that sentence. I am with you! It is annoying and obnoxious. Sadly, it is true. Also, annoying and obnoxious. Feel free to give me the finger here. I can take it. My health, both mental and physical, opened my eyes to everything. Hell, I left my husband two months later. (More on that in a different blog.) I mean, that is powerful thinking!. It also led me to develop Nourished Families. I can support people on finding their path to health and wellness by showing them it doesn't have to look like everyone else's path. Whole30 gave me the tools to customize and stop counting calories. I can go off the track for a moment and then reset. Please don't get me wrong. Mama needs her wine! I love French fries and pizza. I can eat, and I do! But then I get back. I know I am on the right path because this August Whole30 was so much easier than the one I did a year ago. I didn't have to detox as much because I hadn't veered too far off the road. Yet I still learned so much and felt so much better.

Now begins that TRUE learning—the reintroduction. I will post all about it on @nourishedfam. I can't wait. Please feel free to reach out to me if you have any questions or want more information. We need to allow ourselves the right to take care of us. It makes all the difference in the world. I am still learning this, but I know I am getting closer. I call that a Non-Scale Victory for sure!

Welcome to Nourished Families

Chaos...

otherwise known as #momlife

Holy Massachusetts! I can't believe you are here! Welcome to a little something I have been building and dreaming in my head and heart for years. A community of families and women sharing, listening, laughing, crying, loving, and holding on to dear life. Let Nourished Families be the place where you may find answers or ideas to things you've been looking for. You find that perfect way to keep the kids busy. How to swaddle. Improve milk supply or replace a breast pump phalange. Find that new baby wearing gear you've been wanting. Where sometimes you can forget about those kids and find the perfect bite. Feel better about yourself because you've got your shit WAY more together than me today and most days. Let this be the place where we are all honest about the fact that adulting is hard. The tasks never end. There is always something…but in all that mess we call life, there is also TONS of laughter, love, snuggles, and joy. Here we go, Nourished Families Family. Let's get to know each other. I can't wait!

My name is Elizabeth Lehmann.

I almost don't know where to begin. I am 4'11". I am an oversharer. I think I am funny. I have been told I can be a lot. I love my tribe. I am loyal. Passionate. Forgetful. Curious. Usually lost and late. What I am the most is, I am the mother of two incredible little humans. Amelia, who is 10. Sullivan, who is 7. They are gorgeous, funny, smart, soulful, creative, empathic, tiring, stubborn, and needy. They bicker. They snuggle. They rarely clean up after themselves without me freaking out. They make me laugh hard. They make me cry hard. They are incredible. I was until basically right now a stay at home mom to them since Amelia was about 1.5 years old. Before that, I was a behavioral therapist for children with Autism for 10+ years. Their dad and I were able to swing my being home with them. For that, I will be forever grateful. While you are here, you should probably know that we are in the process of divorce, which began about ten months ago. Be prepared. There will be blogs about divorce. It is not easy. But then again, neither is marriage sometimes. Divorce CAN be that thing that makes you a better parent. Better to one another and to yourself. But enough about all that for now...

When Sullivan was in half-day kindergarten, I decided that I wanted to find something I could do that would still allow me to be the kind of mom I wanted. I also wanted something outside the home. I had a postpartum doula with both of my kids. It was a game-changer. That woman will always be known to me be known as Super Doula Theresa. Need I say more? She came into my home. When she left, I swear little cartoon bluebirds were flying around me. I wanted to be this magic to other Mamas. I called Super Doula Theresa to ask her what she thought of the idea. To my surprise, she was all for it. And so began this adventure.

Maybe you read my "About Me" page. Perhaps you didn't. But becoming a mom was not an easy road for me. Honestly, that fact is still so shocking to me. I was able to get pregnant. Staying pregnant…not so much. I was pregnant FIVE times in FOUR years, with only TWO children to hold in my arms today.

That's right. I had our first child Sonny Andrew at 28 weeks. A stillbirth. I still and always will hold Sonny in my heart. His loss was due to missed preeclampsia resulting in my going into DIC. (Feel free to comment or reach out to me for more information on what all of that is.) My daughter Amelia was born a year and a half later. She was three months early because she stopped producing amniotic fluid. There were many other complications throughout her pregnancy; gestational diabetes, blood pressure stuff, labor at twenty-eight weeks, MAJOR, all damn day sickness. Honestly, I think there was more, but I have just blocked it out. She's here and healthy. Hallelujah! Then I had two miscarriages. That was difficult, but thankfully, they were early in the first trimester. Sullivan was my last shot. I really wanted Millie, as we like to call her, to have a sibling. And while his pregnancy was the easiest of the five, it was still fraught with nausea, MANY doctor visits, limited mobility. Not the full restricted bed rest that I was on with Millie's pregnancy. Thank the lord because she was two. (We know that the first baby is all about the first and the second baby is ALL ABOUT THE FIRST.) Mr. Sullivan was born a mere month and a half early. Planned. That was an excellent thing because what the doctors and I didn't know was my uterus was only one contraction away from rupturing. Sully was, as I like to call C-sections, airlifted out. All of my babies were airlifted. Then my insides were rebuilt. My tubes were tied. My gestationally old ass was told, "You are done EVER having any more babies now!" No problem here! Thank you to Dr. Renee Anderson at Pennsylvania Hospital in Philadelphia. That amazing woman put pregnant Humpty Dumpty back together again. She also got my glorious beings here on earth that give me the honor of being called Mom. Grateful is not a big enough word.

You have to know I was so cocky about being pregnant. Not about getting pregnant. I had held the hand, dried the tears, and rejoiced with my very best friend Dorie (and many others) over infertility. Once pregnant, I used to say 16-year-olds and crackheads poop these things out. HORRIBLY INAPPROPRIATE ON SOOOO MANY LEVELS! I know. As women, we just don't talk about how flipping hard all this crap is! It is FREAKING hard. Getting pregnant. Staying pregnant. Being a mom. Being a partner. Being a daughter. Being a sister. Being a friend. Being in the workforce. Being a stay-at-home Mom. As women, we think we are supposed to not only do it all. We have to do it while looking good. Delivering healthy meals. Doing crafts. Having a perfectly decorated home. Oh, and make it to every kid event and be the snack mom. WTF!!!! That crap is impossible!

That's where my wanting to start Nourished Families comes in. I am the doula that is going to tell you every day that you kept your baby or babies alive, safe, and loved one more day...Guess what? That makes you an awesome Mom. And I even mean it! I will be the lactation consultant who will try right by your side to keep that baby on the breast. But if I see that it is torturing you, I will remind you that happy families make happy babies. That you and only you and your partner get to decide what makes the walls of your home happy. That I am here to support those happy walls. I am soon to be the maternal nutritionist (certification starts in September, I can NOT wait!) to gently remind you that what you put into your body matters. It is ok to take the time to be conscious of that for being kind to yourself. I am (also soon to be) the Whole30 coach that cheers so loudly when there is a hiccup in your journey, and you get back on course.

We are not perfect beings. Life is not perfect. There are days when you catch me with my makeup on, and both my kids are clean. Then there are days when makeup is not in the cards, my bra isn't even on, and I am not clean. Kids? Oh yeah...they are on screens. Just like me! I want Nourished Families to be the place where we let out freak flags fly with gusto! This is just the beginning. You will see so many mistakes. So many bloopers. So many redos. I hope you will share all of yours with me. If that is not your place of comfort. No worries. No judgment. Just promise you will laugh with me and not at me. This is going to be one EPIC journey. Again, thank you with all my heart for joining me.